PROK

According to an anonymous cafeteria worker, the pork egg roll is made from "prok," a mixture of meat from crickets, fish, and hamsters, and any other animals found in classrooms that have died. Fillers for prok include pencil shavings, chalk dust, and shredded paper. Prok is rolled into dough, along with shredded cabbage, and deep fried.

Bon appétit, kids!